I don’t know how people can rely on handouts – I would feel so ashamed

It is not easier to give material help in an empowering way, and it is all too easy to foster dependence. What’s one person’s handout may be another’s entitlement.

Some families have become so used to receiving aid that they count on it to survive. Families may hide any feelings of shame, or tune out to them because they rely on the assistance of others so much.

When families complain about the nature of the aid they are given they find it easier to cope with a feeling of entitlement than one of indebtedness.

There may not be much we can do about the past practices that have created dependence, but we can look at the way our material aid projects function now:

• Can we give assistance in ways that rewards positive behaviour, rather than only rewarding families for not coping? For example, matching savings or debt reduction not just giving out food parcels.
  
  
• Do our projects focus on the needs of the recipients rather than the needs of the donor? It may make people feel good to give gifts to disadvantaged families at Christmas, but it may also reduce the family’s involvement in deciding what they want their children to receive.